Today is the first day I am home in LA and the book tour is complete. It has been an incredible three weeks – nine events, seven cities, over 20 interviews, and lots of blessings, with a few expectation hangovers to treat which kept me fresh on my material!!

Sometimes I experience stress and get disappointed (last time I checked I was still human!); however, I have found ways to avoid or prevent the frequency and duration of both by applying what I call in Expectation Hangover the “secret sauce” formula for going after what you want.

This was key for me during this entire book launch process. I share about how I used this secret sauce formula in today’s vlog that ultimately lead to reaching a goal and shifted my experience of how it felt when it was achieved. Watch and you will also hear a beautiful story about my family that makes me cry!

On Friday I found out that Expectation Hangover was #3 on the LA Times best-seller list, which officially makes it a national best seller. First and foremost I want to thank all of YOU because this would not have been possible without your support and inspiration. You are the #1 reason I do what I do. I deeply acknowledge you for being part of my mission to ease suffering on the planet.

Honestly, I really did not think making a list was going to happen. There is so much that goes into it and I was not willing to do some of the things that are necessary. Moreover, my commitment to writing a book that helps people is way more of a priority than status. With that said, it did not feel aligned to totally abandon an intention to fulfill a dream of being a best-selling author because it would mean more books into more hands of people that I can serve.

So my team and I pursued this goal, which was just one of many in this process, with the “secret sauce” formula. What is the secret sauce? It is going after our dreams with high involvement and low attachment. You can read a lot more about this in the prevention plan section of Expectation Hangover.

Involvement is the degree to which we proactively participate in the pursuit of our goals. Attachment is the degree to which our well-being, sense of worthiness, happiness, and peace of mind are dependent on reaching our goals. We create attachment whenever we become overly emotionally invested in a desired outcome, plan, or opinion. When we have any degree of attachment, we have expectations. And when we have expectations, we can have — you guessed it — Expectation Hangovers.

That’s why the best recipe for going after what you want without setting yourself up for an Expectation Hangover is to pursue goals with high involvement and low attachment. You have a strong intention to co-create (together with the Universe) things in your life that are in alignment with your values and goals, but you are not attached to the outcome. Your sense of worthiness, success, or happiness is not tied to whether or not particular things happen. And you remain open to things manifesting in forms different than you may have expected.

You move into a perspective where you take action steps but surrender control, understanding that you are a co-creator with the Universe. You recognize that effort and commitment are important, but that results are not completely up to you and do not dictate your overall well-being.

Wanting things is not wrong. You are worthy and deserving of your dreams. The reason we set goals is because we want to feel a certain way and we think an outcome will produce a desired feeling or experience. What sets us up for disappointment is not our desires, but our attachment to our expectations. @christinhassler (Tweet this!)

I committed to doing what I could that would support the book getting into as many hands as possible without compromising my health, integrity, values, or bank account. I did not make any external result mean anything about me or the value of the book. Instead, I took responsibility for my internal state and focused on the things that would generate the feelings I desired.

WWhen I got the news about the list, I did a “high.” My reaction was more one of being pleasantly surprised because I was already feeling SO MUCH gratitude, fulfillment, purpose, and love for being able to travel around and connect with so many people. The greatest blessing was in the experiences and feelings I had in the process rather than the outcome.

Our external achievements do not define us. In fact if we allow them to, we have to keep raising the bar and enough will never feel like enough.

Friday was also the day of my event in Austin. It was the first time in ten years of doing this work that my parents and sister were in the audience. It was the most incredible experience to share my work and mission with them. To look out into the crowd, see their proud faces, and feel their love and support tops any external outcome I could ever achieve.

Love and connection are what matters. In the pursuit of your goals, please do not lose sight of what counts the most. @christinhassler (Tweet this!). Allow your desires to lead you but remember that you can generate whatever feeling you desire right NOW!

I’d love to hear how you are applying the secret sauce and celebrating all the blessings in your life in the comment section – head on over!

Love,

Christine

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