EP 70: Why Am I Still Single? With Alex

EP70v2Today’s episode is about moving from being single to being in a relationship. I coach Alex on uncovering fears and limiting beliefs that can keep us from being in a relationship, or anything we truly want.

When we desire something, and it does not manifest in our life, we have a tendency to blame ourselves, do a spiritual bypass, or mentally obsess about what we need to change and fix about ourselves to make it manifest. Often, these strategies do not work. What does work is taking a deep and honest look at why not having what we want, is actually what we want. Consciously we want something but there is a hidden fear or limiting belief that is creating a block.

For Alex, it was her fear of rejection. Not being in a relationship feels safer for her. It doesn’t matter how much she desires something, if part of her is scared to have it, it’s hard, if not impossible, to manifest it.

This is very different approach than the dating advice we often hear. A relationship is not a symbolic trophy of self-love. If you are single and want to be in a relationship, ditch the apps, the dating columns, and relationship advice for a while, and do some of the things I encouraged Alex to do. Get honest about what really scares you in having what you want.

*Coaches — Notice I didn’t coach Alex into making a plan to date differently, to love herself more, or to step more into her feminine. Be willing to let go of trying to find a fix-it solution for your clients. Instead, guide them to discovering what is in their way.

If your intention for the New Year is to connect with a tribe of like-minded people, and to feel and act more confident, joining my Inner Circle will assist you with both. The Inner Circle is a membership community, where you get access to one-on-one coaching calls, my customized, guided meditations and visualizations, and lifestyle practices. E-mail Jill@ChristineHassler.com, with any questions you may have.

There are only 3 spots left for my Women’s Spring Retreat March 10-12. Sign up today, so you don’t miss out.

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Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Are you craving a relationship but not having much luck with dating?
  • Do feel conflicted about having a relationship?
  • Do you judge yourself, or think something is wrong with you, because you are single?
  • Is there anything in your life, which is not manifesting, but you don’t know why not?

Alex’s Question:

Alex has reached a phase in her life where she thinks she would like to be in a relationship, but is not sure why she hasn’t drawn in a romantic partner.

Alex’s Key Insights and Ahas:

  • She feels as if she is always pursuing dating.
  • She believes she isn’t doing something correctly when it comes to dating.
  • She is afraid any relationship she gets into will not be successful.
  • She fears rejection.
  • She knows she is a great catch but may not 100% believe it.
  • She feels suffocated when she is overwhelmed by anything.
  • She could be scared of herself.
  • She feels with her head instead of her heart.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

  • She needs to write out guidelines for what she wants to feel in a relationship.
  • She needs to be willing to be vulnerable, and open up her heart completely.
  • She should incorporate a meditation and visualization practice into her life.
  • She should drop the persona she created to keep herself safe, and let herself be truly seen.

Assignments:

  • Ditch the list of everything you want to attract in your life. Work instead to identify the fears that may be in your way.
  • Be vulnerable.
  • If there is something you want in life, but it’s not manifesting, it may be time to reach out to a coach. There are two spots open for private clients. It’s an investment of both time and money. Email Jill@christinehassler.com for more information.

Sponsor:

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Resources:

“Being Single is Not a Disorder” Blog Post
Christine Hassler
Christine Hassler Podcasts
Find me on Snapchat @chrishassler
@christinhassler on Twitter
@christinehassler on Instagram
Christine@christinehassler.com
Assist@ChristineHassler.com – Send your questions to Christine anytime.
Christine’s Books

Tweetables:

We are the creators of our lives. We manifest according to our belief systems. http://apple.co/1hO8XZR… Click To Tweet
If we are always waiting to be rejected, we attract people and situations that play out that pattern.… Click To Tweet
Allow yourself to long for a relationship, without making it mean anything negative that you are not currently in… Click To Tweet

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