EP 74: How to Take Off “Golden Handcuffs” and Go After Your Dreams With Mel

EP74v4Today’s episode is about stepping out of your comfort zone, and following your dreams. Mel has financial security in her current position, but feels called to do something more impactful. She would like guidance on how to get to where she wants to be.

Mel was experiencing two major blocks: fear, and her own limiting beliefs about not being good enough.

When we don’t know what is ahead of us, we are faced with uncertainty, and with uncertainty comes fear. Our security doesn’t come from an external source. The person who makes you safe is you and your connection to source. I encouraged Mel to take off the golden handcuffs. It may feel like safety and security to her, but it is not freedom if she is not happy, and she feels called to do something more. Financial security and wealth are available through various forms. There is a fine line between fear and excitement. If you are at the tipping point between excitement and fear, I encourage you to lean into the excitement, and stop fighting with fear.

Mel’s belief of not being good enough was something we all experience at one time or another. I reminded her that we all have an infinite amount of potential.

During the call, the use of numbing agents came up. The use of pot, alcohol,  shopping, etc., are common when we suppress both emotion and desire.  Mel had some unprocessed emotion from her childhood, and she felt suppressed by her parents. But, as an adult, she was doing to herself what they did to her. If you use numbing agents to suppress your emotions and desires, listen to my Coaches Corner episode How to Stop Numbing with Pot.

Special announcement — We hit 1 million downloads! I am so grateful to all of you, and to celebrate I am giving away a gift to 3 of you. The prize is one month in my Inner Circle membership community for free. You can win by sharing why you like #overitandonwithit on Instagram, Twitter and Facebook.  Just post, tag me and don’t forget to add the #overitandonwithit hashtag!

And, be sure to listen to my new Coaches Corner with Marie Forleo of B-School.  And Andrea Owen from my favorite podcast, Your Kick Ass Life is offering her e-book, How the Crap Talk in Your Head is Making You Crazy and 3 Ways to Change It, for free if you text ‘selftalk’ to 444999.

Also, I created an Over It and On With It survey, just for my listeners, and I would really appreciate it if you would take 2-5 minutes to fill it out to let me know what you like about the show, and what you want to hear more of.

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Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Do you feel imprisoned by golden handcuffs? Do you struggle with the limiting belief of never being enough?
  • Do you think following your dreams is careless or risky?
  • Do you believe you deserve happiness, and are capable of creating it?

Mel’s Question:

Mel would like to know how to lessen her attachment to her income and transition out of her current position to follow her passion.

Mel’s Key Insights and Ahas:

  • She allows fear to make her feel not good enough.
  • She doesn’t completely believe she can feel happy and fulfilled.
  • She believes being happy is being careless, irresponsible and selfish.
  • She would like a closer relationship with her parents.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

  • She should get clear on what will make her feel prepared to make a change.
  • She needs to stop using numbing devices and work through her sadness and anger directed at her mother and father.
  • She needs to write or record her vision to reprogram herself.

Assignments:

  • Prepare yourself to make a change by getting clear about what you want.
  • Stop using numbing devices to suppress your emotions and desires.
  • Write down or record your vision.

Resources:

Christine Hassler
Christine Hassler Podcasts
Find me on Snapchat @chrishassler
@christinhassler on Twitter
@christinehassler on Instagram
Christine@christinehassler.com
Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Send your questions to Christine, to be answered on Coaches Corner.

Tweetables:

We all are born with the same potential. http://apple.co/1hO8XZR #overitandonwithit Click To Tweet
It’s not about how we make the fear go away, but how we work with our fear. http://apple.co/1hO8XZR… Click To Tweet
Often, the pressure of what we don’t want, creates the openness of what we do want. http://apple.co/1hO8XZR… Click To Tweet

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  • jojo80

    This has been another great podcast and there were several mind opening moments for me. I have done several things from your book and have written letters but I have more work to do but the comment about the stop and go due to not handling the emotions first. However it is hard for me at times to bo ok with saying our parents did the best they could. I have written letters and felt improvement but the hurt comes back. I was molested by my farther and saying he did the best he could is not ok. I know I need to let this pain go but I don’t know what to say or think to move forward