This call is about being willing and committed to truly healing past trauma. The caller, Cori, asks how to process her trauma in a way that doesn’t make her feel more traumatized. If any of you are feeling this way and want to understand how to process your past without fear and crying all the time, I think you will appreciate this episode. And, if trauma has been part of your past listen to this episode in a calm space where you can really take it in.

Releasing pain and going through the process of healing is hard sometimes because we are finally giving ourselves permission to feel all the feelings that we didn’t get to feel at the time. We don’t have to re-traumatize ourselves.

When more and more people speak openly about the trauma they have experienced, more of us are activated or triggered to remember our own trauma. When we dive into personal development work, we need to wear a seatbelt and sometimes we go a little too fast and sometimes we attempt to process things on our own. It can be overwhelming. It’s important to reach out and ask for guidance from a professional.

Often times, if we have experienced a lot of trauma, especially, abuse, our worthiness takes a hit and we identify with an addiction to suffering because we think that is what we deserve. But, individuals who have experienced the most pain in their past often have the biggest purposes, the biggest hearts, the biggest capacity to be healers. Know that there is a purpose to your pain and know that it doesn’t have to live inside of you.

Willingness and commitment to the healing process are all you need to get momentum started. You don’t need to know the ‘how.’ When dealing with trauma or major issues from our past, we can’t know the ‘how’ on our own. We are not supposed to. There are so many personal development resources. There are online products and online courses on my site. They are very useful and they can help people overcome a lot. I recommend working with a qualified and skillful practitioner to release traumatic experiences is not only important, but it is also imperative.

Reminders: The Spring Retreat for women in March is filling up. If you would like more information email My Personal Mastery Course is online and to help you co-create your life AND there is one personal coaching client space available. There are only 8 spaces per year available for personal coaching directly from me. Email for more information.

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Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Are you doing a lot of personal development work but it’s beginning to feel overwhelming?
  • Do you feel this life that you are dreaming of but your current reality is so far from it you don’t think it is ever going to happen?
  • Are you terrified of actually feeling your feelings because you feel you may never get to the other side of it?
  • When you do feel your feelings is there an inner judgment that comes up that analyzes and reacts so your feelings aren’t honored?

Cori’s Question:

Cori is looking for guidance about how not to be re-traumatized when she does personal development work to break the cycle of shame that started during her traumatic childhood.

Cori’s Key Insights and Ahas:

  • She is the feeling feelings that may have been tucked away for a long time.
  • She has fear about releasing her feelings.
  • She feels alone and isolated when she re-processes her trauma.
  • She wants to be relaxed and comfortable in her body.
  • She wants to feel secure in her life.
  • She had some friendships dissolve over the summer.
  • She is scared she won’t ever get the things she really wants.
  • She has a comfort zone with pain and suffering.
  • She is willing to heal and deal.
  • She is worthy and deserving and there is nothing wrong with her.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

  • She needs to work with skilled practitioners.
  • She needs to be willing to let herself fall apart.
  • She needs to quiet down the internal Judger in her head and let compassion take over.
  • She needs to reach out to a family member and ask for help.
  • She needs to tell herself she is safe.

Takeaways For You:

  • Consider if you have an addiction to suffering. If so, are you willing to break it?
  • Get help. Get guidance. Ask for help and then express your emotions from a place of compassion.
  • Find a way to connect to the part of you that knows it is not broken. You are worthy, and whole, and complete, and lovable.


Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community.

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The releasing process may be painful short-term but long-term holding it in will be more damaging. #overitandonwithit Click To Tweet When we release and heal trauma it’s as if the brain and the nervous system are completely rewiring. #overitandonwithit Click To Tweet After trauma, we piece ourselves back together with duct tape just so we can survive in the world. #overitandonwithit Click To Tweet


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