This call is about overcoming roadblocks to motivation. Desiree calls in concerned about her ability to follow through, and commit to her goals. But, in this as in most coaching sessions, we delve deeper into why she is holding herself back and suppressing her feelings. If you relate to not feeling motivated and are ready to shine your light, this episode will help you discover how to take risks and go after your dreams.

Often, when we have a parent that is hard on us or doesn’t create a safe space for us we think that not doing things will bring us safety and that feeling things is dangerous. And because of that, we miss out on being mothered. Anybody can be a mother. Mothering is more about the archetype of mother and holding a space of compassion, and nurturing. Maybe you don’t need to be motivated right now, maybe what you need is some mothering.

As adults, if we expect someone else to come along and fulfill the places and the roles we yearned for from our parents, we will be waiting for a really long time. So much of our healing and growth happens when we consciously choose to be that parent that we didn’t have.

The things we wish someone else would have done for us are the things we need to do for ourselves.

To celebrate Thanksgiving week here in the U.S. I have a free gratitude visualization and meditation for all of my listeners. Follow me on Instagram, @ChristineHassler and I will announce how to access it.

And, thanks to Joovv Red Light Therapy I feel a difference in my muscle recovery and joint pain. I use it every day. It also improves skin health and reduces inflammation on a cellular level.

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Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Are you feeling a block to motivation or are you really just blocking your feelings?
  • Did you grow up in a house where it was safe to express yourself?
  • How do you express your feelings? Do you suppress your feelings and sweep them under the rug?
  • Are you incredibly critical of yourself? Do you feel ashamed, insecure, or nervous when you talk to people or in a group?

Desiree’s Question:

Desiree gets excited about her goals but never follows through with accomplishing them. She would like to know how to be more motivated.

Desiree’s Key Insights and Ahas:

  • She has problems setting realistic goals for herself.
  • She doesn’t keep her personal commitments.
  • She is a people pleaser.
  • She feels that if she expressed herself she will be ignored, rejected, or judged.
  • She plays it safe.
  • She feels shame about not being motivated enough.
  • She suppresses her feelings.
  • She would like an apology from her mother.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

  • She needs to forgive herself for judging herself for not being motivated enough.
  • She needs to recognize when she is upset and use the temper tantrum and release writing techniques from Expectation Hangover.
  • She needs to mother herself and give herself a feeling of safety.
  • She needs to remind herself that it is OK to be vulnerable and to feel her feelings.

Takeaways For You:

  • If you were writing the screenplay of your life, what would you as the main character need to go through, to come into your own and to have the happy ending you deserve?
  • If you want some additional help join my Personal Mastery Course, the online program that includes monthly coaching calls. Grab a copy of Expectation Hangover or attend my for-women-only Spring Retreat.


Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community.

To watch episodes of coaching sessions, go to

Christine’s Personal Mastery Course

Christine’s Signature Retreat

Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner

Christine on Facebook

Christine’s Books, including Expectation Hangover

@ChristinHassler on Twitter

@ChristineHassler on Instagram — If you want to be a guest on this show.

Joovv Red Light Therapy


The things we wish someone else would have done for us are the things we need to do for ourselves. #overitandonwithit Click To Tweet What judgments, limiting beliefs, or pain are you carrying around that you no longer need? #overitandonwithit Click To Tweet Part of growth and wisdom is knowing when a chapter of your life needs to end and a new story needs to be written. #overitandonwithit Click To Tweet