EP 226: Getting Over a Broken Heart and Being Seen with Sarah

This episode is about finding your voice when you have low self-worth. Today’s caller, Sarah, calls in asking about a breakup but as usual, we dive deeper into core issues she has been carrying around since before her birth.

Not being able to see things from a self-honoring perspective is one of the many side effects of low self-worth. People who have zero self-worth give up on themselves completely and don’t call in or listen to podcasts like this. If you believe you have low self-worth I want you to recognize the ways in which you act that demonstrate your self-worth. I promise they are there. You can’t just focus on how you have no or low self-worth because it’s not true. You wouldn’t be listening to this if you didn’t. Acknowledge the ways you take care of yourself.

Even if you are an introvert you need to take up space and be seen. Especially in your most intimate relationships. Low self-worth can make it challenging to attract a healthy relationship.

If something in this call resonates with you, you may have a leaving pattern. A leaving pattern is a coping mechanism or a personality pattern we often develop if we have an in-the-womb trauma or birth trauma. It’s when we don’t feel safe to come into the world. The coping mechanism makes us good at checking out. It’s also common for people who have a leaving pattern to avoid confrontation and often not speak up for themselves. A big part of healing the leaving pattern is to not tolerate shitty situations, to not settle.

Don’t miss out on tonight’s group coaching call. It’s about setting your intentions for the year and how to be an empath in 2020. Go to ChristineHassler.com/group to join in and to access group coaching call archives visit ChristineHassler.com/group-coaching-replays

To release self-protective behaviors, heal past pain, and reclaim your confidence, peace, power, and purpose, attend my Spring Retreat in San Diego, March 6th–8th. To accelerate your growth and invest in yourself visit ChristineHassler.com/spring-retreat or email Jill@ChristineHassler.com. Listen to this Coaches Corner episode for more information.

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Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Have you gone through a heartbreak that you still haven’t gotten over?
  • Do you often do things because you feel obligated or forced?
  • Is it hard for you to speak up?
  • Do you feel invisible?
  • Is there a calling you want to pursue but self-doubt gets in the way?

Sarah’s Question:

Sarah recently experienced a break-up from a relationship that she thought was “the one” and would like guidance on how to move forward.

Sarah’s Key Insights and Ahas:

  • She says she hasn’t had a broken heart before.
  • She found herself changing during her relationship.
  • She wouldn’t speak up for herself.
  • She didn’t feel an intimate connection with her ex.
  • Her parents divorced when she was 16.
  • Her parents didn’t know they were having twins.
  • She is emotionally intimate with her twin sister.
  • She has abandonment issues.
  • She doesn’t know how to handle the emotions she is feeling.
  • She feels uncomfortable when she is given attention.
  • She has low self-worth.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

  • She needs to release the judgment she places on herself.
  • She needs to work with a therapist or coach using regressive therapy.


  • Think about your birth and early childhood. Was there any trauma? Did you feel safe and wanted? Explore it and cover it in your personal development work.
  • If you do relate to the leaving pattern, if you are good at checking out of your body and going into the spiritual world, I encourage you to do things to get you more into your body.
  • Consider your own self-worth. If you resonate with it being low, commit to doing some work around it. Investing in yourself is a great way.
  • Come to my Spring Retreat or Personal Mastery course.
  • Make a list of all the people you’ve held back your words to and make a commitment to get them out.
  • If you have a dream you want to pursue tell more people about it, own it.


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Anytime we have enmeshment with someone, it can be a block to a healthy relationship coming in. Click To Tweet Even introverts need to take up space and be seen. Click To Tweet Not being able to see things from a self-honoring perspective is one of the many side effects of low self-worth. Click To Tweet

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