EP 280: How Working Too Hard on Yourself is a Block to What You Desire with Dani

This call is about self-acceptance and leading a fully-expressed life. Dani calls in looking for guidance on how to get out of the funk she is in. She feels unmotivated and burned out. But, as we discuss, the beautiful thing about burnout is that it is a wake-up call to tell us we are living in an unsustainable way. It is in the unknown that magical opportunities present themselves. When we plan and control everything there is little room for the universe to surprise us.

A lot of us are committed to personal growth. But, we must be aware of when we are working on ourselves a little too much and sometimes just let it be. Be in radical self-acceptance. Be in a place of just accepting where we are and shifting our energy into one of love and gratitude. It is the balance between not brushing stuff under the rug and living in denial but not overworking ourselves so we are always a personal growth project.

When we grew up in a house where there was a lot of uncertainty or chaos there is a frenetic energy that happens. It is constantly looking for safety and certainty. It can keep us very busy. If you relate to that, I encourage you just to stop and slow down. Because our soul, or the universe, does not give us much momentum on something when it comes from a place of lack. Sometimes we just need to stop and be with ourselves.

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Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Are you feeling stuck, like you are spinning your wheels and going nowhere?
  • Do you find yourself confused on how to pursue your goals?
  • Is it hard for you to accept that you have flaws and so-called weaknesses?
  • Do you think you “should” be somewhere different than you are today? More advanced? More wealthy? More XYZ?

Dani’s Question:

Dani feels a loss of identity, burned out, and unmotivated and would like guidance on how to break free of her funk.

Dani’s Key Insights and Ahas:

  • She was a full-time musician who started a life coaching business last year.
  • She feels she has a block around her career.
  • Her focus on her career is a coping strategy.
  • She puts a lot of pressure on herself.
  • She wants to live a balanced life.
  • She’s done a lot of personal development work.
  • She is always searching for something and pushing herself.
  • She hasn’t felt safe in her life.
  • She has no anticipation for the future.
  • She feels uncertain.
  • She has taken many risks in her life.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

  • Resist the habit of trying to figure everything out.
  • Embrace uncertainty.
  • Give herself the gift of feeling safe in the present moment.
  • Permit herself to just be.
  • Move out of distraction and into stillness and safety.

Takeaways For You:


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The beautiful thing about burnout is that it is a wake-up call. It’s an opportunity to stop living in an unsustainable way. Click To Tweet It is in the unknown that magical opportunities present themselves. When we plan and control everything there is little room for the universe to surprise us. Click To Tweet What we often think of as depression is our system learning how to be resourced in uncertain times. Click To Tweet

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