This episode is about navigating a different path than your family. Today’s caller, George, grew up in a healthy family environment but always felt he was on a different spiritual path than the rest of his family. He asks for guidance about accepting differences and for practices to heal his inner child. If you are a generational pattern breaker, or if you are choosing a different path than the one your family is on, this episode offers guidance for you too.

For many generational pattern breakers, we are conflicted between our soul path and our family lineage. We are born knowing we are on a different path. We all come into life with our level of consciousness, the beliefs we adhere to, and our soul path. It may be difficult to understand when all the other members of a family are committed to something we may not be committed to. We have the family we are born into and then we find our soul family.

When we choose something different, it can feel terrifying to break out of the family norm. One of our survival needs is wired to our nervous system and the part of our nervous system that is connected to fight, flight, freeze, or fawn is belonging. When we sever any type of tie to family, even if we can logically understand it, it still wakes up our need for belonging. It can bring up feelings of guilt or shame.

We believe that our family should be the ones who know us best but sometimes they are not. And, that is okay. It doesn’t mean we can’t love them or have a relationship with them, it just means that we find our soul family in other places.

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Consider/Ask Yourself:

• Do you feel like the outsider in your family or the generational pattern breaker?
• Have you made a choice your family doesn’t approve of?
• Is your family trying to fix you, trying to convince you to come back to their religion, business, or hometown?
• Do you feel like your own flesh and blood doesn’t really understand you?

George’s Question:

George wants to know how to navigate and set boundaries within the relationship he has with his family.

George’s Key Insights and Ahas:

• He was raised in a Christian household yet his current spiritual path differs.
• He feels distant from his family.
• He wants his family to accept him for who he is.
• He asked his family to respect his spiritual journey.
• He had a healthy upbringing but felt misunderstood.
• He feels like an outsider for leaving the rural community that his family lives and worships in.
• He realizes he is living his life for himself and not his family.
• He is having a difficult time accepting that there are issues they will not be able to connect on.
• For a long time, he associated spirituality with the Christian religion.
• He is currently experiencing a higher level of spiritual growth.
• In some ways, he has always felt different and unique in his family.
• His inner child is reluctant to let his feelings go.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

• Know that the connection he wants with his family may not be possible.
• Understand no spiritual path is better, they are just different.
• Have a conversation with his inner child who didn’t feel understood and have compassion and love for himself.
• Enjoy his relationship with his family without talking about religion or spirituality.
• Practice dominant handwriting, the empty chair process, or journaling when talking with his inner child.
• Allow his spiritual practice to lead him through his experience.

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Tweetables:

True intimacy means people can truly see us and understand us. Click To Tweet What is confusing about growing up in a relatively “good” family is that we may not realize where we might be hurting. Click To Tweet We have the family we are born into and then we find our soul family. Click To Tweet