I got so much feedback from last week’s blog about overcoming self-consciousness that I wanted to share a little more on this topic.

Today let’s look at social anxiety – from mild to severe.

Why do we get so anxious? And how do we shift it?

I answer these questions in the video.

Many who suffer from social anxiety may be suffering in silence. So much so that going to any kind of social event is agonizing and making friends is challenging. This leads to a lot of isolation – or if you are in a relationship an over dependence on that person.

But the #1 reason that social anxiety is so painful is because it reinforces the illusion of separation (Tweet This!). The truth is we are all connected and we are not separate. However we live in a world that makes that hard to remember. Plus, not everyone is an extrovert. Sure, some people can walk into a party or networking group and talk to anybody, but others (in fact most people) cannot.

How do we overcome social anxiety?

First, it begins with radical self-acceptance. As I’ve healed a lot of the misunderstandings of feeling like something was wrong with me that made me unlikeable and kept me separate, social anxiety is not something I struggle with anymore.

Your own inner judgments and self-criticisms are what are creating social anxiety. The more you speak to yourself in a supportive, loving way, the more confident you will feel. Listen to me coach Jenna out of social anxiety on my Over It and On With It podcast here.

Second, if you cannot think great thoughts about yourself, then stop thinking about yourself so much!! Stop being self-centered. When we are obsessing about what others are thinking about us we are only focused on ourselves. Stop making it about you and focus on connecting with others instead.

Remember these two key things about other people during your next socializing moment:

#1: They are not thinking about you as much as you think they are. And if they are, it is not the bad stuff you think they are thinking!

#2: They are not big scary monsters!! People like to connect and are more open to connecting with you than you think.

If you do get a bit intimidated or nervous around connecting, have some questions in mind you can ask people beyond “how are you doing?”. Google great icebreaker questions and get a lot of ideas.

You 100% can overcome social anxiety. It just may take some practice – but you must get out of your head (and your house) to do it.

Questions? Comments? Head on over to the blog, I love to hear from you!

And speaking of confidence, my pal Gabby Bernstein just released a free video today on how to gain the confidence to rise up and truly own your voice. Go here to watch.

Love,
Christine

&

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