Tag Archives: procrastination

EP 135: Stop Procrastinating and Self-Sabotaging with Angela

EP135 (1)

This call is about is about procrastination and self-sabotage. Today’s caller, Angela, believes she puts things off and sabotages herself but as you will hear in the call it is really about her feeling safe and her fear of being seen.

We don’t sabotage ourselves or procrastinate because we are weak or unmotivated. There is some payoff that keeps us safe.

No matter how much we want something in our present-day self and no matter how much we are committed to a mission, if some part of us thinks that accomplishing our mission is a threat to our survival, then our mission takes a back burner to the survival instinct that is keeping us safe.

Sometimes it’s the people who have felt different who make the biggest difference. If you felt different, alone, like you didn’t fit in or that you didn’t belong, consider it an important part of your journey to making a difference. The difference you make may be in a big way as a coach or a teacher or it may be in a more intimate way. You may be a different kind of parent, employee, or citizen. We all make differences in a unique and special way. Often, it is the struggles that made us feel different that prepare us to make the difference we are here to make.

Our higher wisdom will always call us toward people, pets, and opportunities that give us the opportunity to embody and express the qualities we don’t think we have but do have.

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Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Are you a procrastinator? Do you put things off or try to perfect them and hold off on getting things out there?
  • Do you find yourself self-sabotaging? Do you take five steps forward but then four steps back?
  • Do you deal with anxiety? Especially when it comes to being seen.
  • Growing up did you feel different like you didn’t fit in and all you wanted to do was be normal?

Angela’s Question:

Angela wants to know how to move past her repeating patterns of procrastination and self-sabotage.

Angela’s Key Insights and Ahas:

  • She feels anxious about being seen.
  • She doesn’t believe in herself.
  • She is embarking on a career as a health coach.
  • She lost both parents at a young age.
  • She didn’t feel safe as a child.
  • She didn’t feel “normal.”
  • She felt ashamed of her family.
  • She is self-conscious.
  • Her inner child doesn’t feel safe.

How to get over it and on with it:

  • She needs to make herself feel safe.
  • She needs to discover her inner mother.
  • She should become compassionate with herself.
  • She should learn to be present with herself.
  • She should sign up for an improv class.
  • She should write her parents an “I wish” letter.
  • She should redefine what being safe means to her.

Assignments and Takeaways:

  • If you engage in procrastination and self-sabotaging behavior, look at the payoff you receive from it. When you find the payoff, you can figure out how to get the same payoff in a healthy, more updated way.
  • If you are afraid to be seen because you don’t feel safe, redefine safety. Make sure your definition of safety includes other people.
  • If you had parents you feel were physically, mentally, or emotionally disabled in any way, consider why your soul picked them to be your parents.
  • Do improv or something that gets you seen and out of your comfort zone.


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EP 116: Trapped in a Dead End Job as a Single Mom with Shanna


This episode is about breaking out of a self-imposed prison cell and taking a conscious action which will lead to change. Today’s caller, Shanna, needs to squelch her limiting beliefs and embrace her strengths and her power.

Shanna has been punishing herself. Shame does that to us. When we feel ashamed about something we overcompensate and that becomes our punishment.

Anytime we are in overcompensation mode and do not allow ourselves to live the life we really want, we keep ourselves in a self-imposed prison.

It’s a humbling thing to realize that we are the common denominator in situations we don’t want. But, it’s important that we don’t blame ourselves. When we find ourselves at this crossroads, it is time to start creating the things we want instead of the things we don’t want.

Where are you procrastinating and what will it take for you to change?

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Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Do you feel stuck in a job or relationship and you feel you can’t get out of it?
  • Do you feel over-responsible in your life but is responsibility an area that could use some growth?
  • Are you really free? Are you locked in a self-imposed prison because you don’t think you have any choices?
  • Do you procrastinate in making a change until you are forced to do so?

Shanna’s Question:

Shanna is having a hard time leaving a job she feels is a toxic environment.

Shanna’s Key Insights and Ahas:

  • She feels she may not find a better job.
  • She doesn’t feel worthy of help.
  • Parenting is the hardest thing she’s ever done.
  • She felt shame around her pregnancy.
  • She is brutally hard on herself.
  • She doesn’t believe she can make an internal shift.
  • Her fear-based predictions of how things will go are off.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

  • She should start looking for another job.
  • She needs to believe she can succeed at what she wants to do.
  • She should avoid letting her outer experience dictate her inner experience.
  • She should remove the word ‘try’ from her vocabulary.
  • She should uplevel her responsibility and embrace her power and strength.
  • She should write out her plan of action.


  • You have the ability to respond to situations in life as you choose. How are you choosing to respond to things?
  • If you are stuck, what is your why? Why are you procrastinating and making excuses?
  • Stop trying to ‘figure things out.’ Make the necessary internal shifts and take action.


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