If you haven’t noticed you are not the only human on the planet. We are all spiritual beings having the human experience journey together!! This email is to remind you that you are NOT ALONE and you do not have to figure things out ON YOUR OWN.
I would not be where I am today without the help of the coaches, therapists, spiritual guides, friends and soul family in my life. Yes connecting to my own inner wisdom and love has been massively important to my growth, but without the support of others to serve as mirrors and teachers, I do not know if I could have done it.
What I have learned is that healthy support from others is an essential part of our overall well being. There are wounds from our past we carry, or experiences that we go through, that require the love, compassion, and expert care from others to truly heal.
My encouragement to you today is to review the current level of support you have in your life. Here are some questions for you to consider:
- Do you think you “should” be able to get over certain things on your own so you resist speaking about them or asking for help?
- Does asking for help feel weak to you?
- Have you hired someone to help you in the past but it actually didn’t feel supportive so now you are hesitant to invest again?
- Are you in therapy or working with someone and it feels “comfortable” but nothing is really changing?
- Do you have friends in your life that truly know you and can hold space for your vulnerability?
- Is “I can’t afford it” your excuse for why you don’t have professional support in your life? And what is that excuse costing you in terms of peace of mind and future earning potential?
- Are there unhealthy people in your life that you allow to stay close, and rather than supporting you, they drain you?
Hopefully those questions triggered some aha moments and potentially an action step to upgrade your support team.
Now a few tips for you when looking for support in a therapist, coach, healer or guide:
- Make sure you feel SAFE with the person. You’ll know this immediately because true healers know how to create a feeling of safety.
- Make sure you do NOT feel judged. This is a part of safety as well. You want to hire someone that gives you 100% permission to be fully seen with zero judgment.
- Avoid “fixers” and “pushers” especially when you are beginning your personal growth journey or dealing with something super tender. A good professional knows you are not broken so they won’t attempt to fix by giving a bunch of advice or to-do’s. They also will not push you in a way that makes you feel unsafe. Compassion is what is required.
- Speak up!! If you feel you are not getting what you need, share that fully. It is not your responsibility to make sure the person that is supporting you feels okay! It is your time to receive.
And when it comes to friends, my best tip is be intentional about befriending people who are also doing their own personal development work. They are far more likely to support you in a healthy way if they are getting the support they need in life as well!
To hear a little more about what healthy support sounds like, check out my podcast coaching session with Megan NEXT week (it will be available on April 3rd). You’ll hear me hold space for her in a way that felt super supportive to her so it is a great model for you. This week’s episode is about breaking free of a running from intimacy pattern. It’s also a great one to listen to see how I drop some truth bombs with compassion. Go here to listen.
Finally, if you would like more of my support, the best way to get it is to join my Personal Mastery Program. You get lots of curriculum plus monthly coaching calls and a live one day retreat with me. And the program is yours for life. Go here to learn more and join our very supportive community.
Sending you so much love!
p.s. Attention EAST COASTERS I’m coming to you this summer! I’ll be teaching a workshop at the Omega Institute June 14-16. Go here to join me. This is the ONLY event I have planned for the year on the east coast.
p.p.s. Want to join me for an epic retreat in Hawaii??? Enrollment is now open to women, men and couples. Details here.