Tag Archives: transformation

Is There Someone You’re Trying to Change or Save?

Is there someone in your life you really hope will change? Do you find yourself taking on the responsibility for other people’s transformation? Do you even get annoyed when you see someone you care about not living into the potential you see in them?

I get it. When I dove into all this personal growth stuff in my early twenties, boy oh boy, did I find myself preaching a lot. I had so much new information I wanted to share about how we can awaken and free ourselves from suffering. When I saw someone suffering, I felt a responsibility to save them. And when someone was not acting the way I thought was best, I really believed I could change them. HA!

What I have learned over the years is that it is not our job or our right to save anyone. But obviously we want to make a positive impact on others so how do we do that without taking on the responsibility of savior?

Many years ago I was in a relationship with someone and wanted him to be different. My spiritual teacher at the time said something to me that I have never forgotten. As I was complaining about how he wasn’t doing “his work” and “diving deep enough into his issues” she looked at me and lovingly said, “Christine, you do not walk into a nursery and wake up sleeping babies.”

In that moment, I got it . . .

People wake up when they are ready to wake up. Sure we may inspire some part of their awakening but ultimately it is on their own Divine timing. It is more loving to give someone the dignity of their own process instead of trying to try to change them. (Tweet This!!)

This may make logical sense; however, often it’s hard to give up trying to change someone – be it a friend, family member or romantic partner. You think your love is the magic potion that will save or transform them. You see the hurt little boy or girl under the toxic behavior. You recognize the pain underneath the addiction. You can see all their potential and possibility.

I see this pattern in so many, especially those of you Lightworkers.  But it is exhausting to take on the responsibility for someone else’s transformation. And the reason it is exhausting is because it is not possible. The only person you can change is the one reading these words right now.

Going back to the example from my own life, I realized that the person that really needed to go to a deeper level spiritually and emotionally was me. But it was way easier to fixate on him and all the things he could and should do differently.

My encouragement to you is turn your focus back toward yourself and give the other person back to God. Their awakening is between them and their Higher Power.

If someone is not changing or evolving in the way you are requesting or hoping to inspire, that is not your fault. You have a huge heart with so much love to give and I understand that it feels like love can heal anything.

Sure we can be catalysts for another person’s change but in MOST cases in order to be that catalyst we have to be totally unattached to being it. It is detachment, acceptance and honoring our own truth that often creates the inspiration for someone to find the truth within themselves. That said, don’t try to strategize about how to be unattached hoping they will change – that is still attachment!

Instead walk the talk. Be the vibration you desire from others. What inspires people most is how you live your life.  Stop trying to wake up sleeping babies. . . let their precious souls rest until they are ready.

Is there someone you have been trying to save or trigger their transformation? I am here to support you in liberating yourself from that responsibility and respecting their process.

Fondly,

Christine

Coaches Corner: America’s #1 Transformation Coach Drew Canole

Screen Shot 2017-09-18 at , Sep 18>10.40.25 AM

You’ll LOVE this conversation. Drew came over to my house and we had an incredible chat that covered a lot of ground: healing our past, forgiveness, relationships, health and weight release, detox, and SO much more.

Fueled by small-town values and a big vision for a better planet, Drew Canole begins each day with one simple goal in mind – to positively impact the lives of others. Through his work as a Personal Coach and endeavors such as EnrichYourExistence.com and FitLife.tv, Drew aims to inspire and motivate others to search deep within themselves to create an abundant, healthy and fulfilling life. “Improve one life; improve the world.”

Drew was born and raised in the small, rural community of Lake City in Northern Michigan. After attending Central Michigan University, he launched a successful career in finance before recognizing that his greatest talent was helping others discover their untapped potential. He currently resides in San Diego, where his work as an author, fitness specialist and transformation expert has made him one of the most reputable Personal Coaches in Southern California.

Drew is committed to the conviction that people are at their best when challenged. He pushes others to bust through personal barriers and reach new heights in physical, mental and spiritual well-being.

http://fitlife.tv/

https://www.organifishop.com coupon code CHRISTINE to get 20% off.

Subscribe in iTunes | Stitcher | SoundCloud | Android | Google

podcastb

EP 96: How the Changes You Make on the Inside Affect Your Outside World with Jenn

EP96v1This episode is about shifting your external world while making internal changes. Today’s caller, Jenn, has been through transformational changes, and believes she is confused about her work as a relationship coach. Anyone who is on the growth path will relate to this call in some way.

As we uncover and heal our issues, either in relationships or in the physical, we shift our vibration. Our energetic selves change, which creates a shift in what we’re attracted to and what we attract. Dis-ease and/or toxic relationships are heavy in energetic weight. As we heal, clear, and forgive, it shifts our vibration and it creates changes in our outside world. Some changes happen naturally and some just give us an unsettling feeling about something not being right.

As we shift consciousness our identity shifts, and as it does it can feel confusing, because our external life is not congruent with our internal life.

Just because you don’t have clarity about something, or something doesn’t feel as fulfilling as it used to, doesn’t mean you are confused. You are in a time of change and transformation. For something to transform, it must go through a period of chaos and uncertainty. Don’t rush to figure it out — allow it to be revealed.

To my Aussie Friends — My annual trip to Australia is slated for the first 2 weeks of October, 2017. I will make time for private intensives and possibly a personal growth retreat or mastermind for wellness entrepreneurs. If you are interested email Jill@ChristineHassler.com ASAP!

And as we are coming up on the 100th episode of this podcast, Over It and On With It has caught the attention of the PodcastOne network. It means exposure to a much larger audience, and access to advertisers who help pay production costs.  Yay! I’m hoping this allows me to add more coaching episodes. 

Subscribe in iTunes | Stitcher | SoundCloud | Android | Google

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Is there some aspect of your life that doesn’t feel right, or just feels off?
  • Have you healed a relationship or physical issue that has catalyzed wanting to make changes in other aspects of your life?
  • Can you relate to being a chameleon to stay safe? Are you a people pleaser?
  • Are you scared of being vulnerable or being seen?

Jenn’s Question:

Jenn feels she has lost her inspiration and passion towards her business. She wants to gain clarity around her coaching business.

Jenn’s Key Insights and Ahas:

  • She had a falling out with her mother.
  • She was physically ill.
  • She internalizes her mother’s issues.
  • She was a people pleaser and chameleon around her mother.
  • She has always been there for others.
  • Her relationship coaching feels shallow to her now.
  • She’s committed to getting out of her head.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

  • She should bring more of her own voice into her business.
  • She shouldn’t underestimate the value she brings to her clients.
  • For guidance, she should look at the way the people she appreciates share their stories.
  • She should share her emotional depths.

Action Steps:

  • Get Expectation Hangover if you don’t have it already, and in the spiritual section do the lesson quest exercise under the role of the seeker.
  • Take an inventory of your external life. Does it match your internal life?
  • How can you be more vulnerable and honest? Think of the ways you are a people pleaser or play small. How can you step into a deeper level of authenticity?
  • Where are you telling yourself you are confused when you are not? Can you allow yourself to be in uncertainty?

Resources:

Christine Hassler

Christine Hassler Podcasts

Inner Circle Membership Community

@ChristinHassler on Twitter

@christinehassler on Instagram

Jill@ChristineHassler.com

Expectation Hangover: Overcoming Disappointment in Work, Love, and Life, by Christine Hassler

Tweetables:

Bring more of you and your own voice into your brand and your business. http://apple.co/1hO8XZR #overitandonwithit Click To Tweet

As you evolve, allow your career, your health, and your finances to evolve with you. http://apple.co/1hO8XZR… Click To Tweet Be willing to have the courage to make the external changes to keep up with your internal growth… Click To Tweet

podcastb

Coaches Corner: Are you trying to change someone else?

1200x1200-ChristineHassler-PodcastCoverIn this coaches corner Christine discusses whether or not it’s possible to change someone else. Consider: Is there someone in your life you really hope will change? Do you find yourself taking on the responsibility for other people’s transformation? Do you even get annoyed when you see someone you care about not living into the potential you see in them?

Christine explains why we are tempted to change others and teaches you how to let go of expectations of other people. You will learn that it is not your job or your right to save anyone along with some tips on how you actually can make an impact on the lives of others.

Continue reading