Tag Archives: dreams

EP 74: How to Take Off “Golden Handcuffs” and Go After Your Dreams With Mel

EP74v4Today’s episode is about stepping out of your comfort zone, and following your dreams. Mel has financial security in her current position, but feels called to do something more impactful. She would like guidance on how to get to where she wants to be.

Mel was experiencing two major blocks: fear, and her own limiting beliefs about not being good enough.

When we don’t know what is ahead of us, we are faced with uncertainty, and with uncertainty comes fear. Our security doesn’t come from an external source. The person who makes you safe is you and your connection to source. I encouraged Mel to take off the golden handcuffs. It may feel like safety and security to her, but it is not freedom if she is not happy, and she feels called to do something more. Financial security and wealth are available through various forms. There is a fine line between fear and excitement. If you are at the tipping point between excitement and fear, I encourage you to lean into the excitement, and stop fighting with fear.

Mel’s belief of not being good enough was something we all experience at one time or another. I reminded her that we all have an infinite amount of potential.

During the call, the use of numbing agents came up. The use of pot, alcohol,  shopping, etc., are common when we suppress both emotion and desire.  Mel had some unprocessed emotion from her childhood, and she felt suppressed by her parents. But, as an adult, she was doing to herself what they did to her. If you use numbing agents to suppress your emotions and desires, listen to my Coaches Corner episode How to Stop Numbing with Pot.

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And, be sure to listen to my new Coaches Corner with Marie Forleo of B-School.  And Andrea Owen from my favorite podcast, Your Kick Ass Life is offering her e-book, How the Crap Talk in Your Head is Making You Crazy and 3 Ways to Change It, for free if you text ‘selftalk’ to 444999.

Also, I created an Over It and On With It survey, just for my listeners, and I would really appreciate it if you would take 2-5 minutes to fill it out to let me know what you like about the show, and what you want to hear more of.

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Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Do you feel imprisoned by golden handcuffs? Do you struggle with the limiting belief of never being enough?
  • Do you think following your dreams is careless or risky?
  • Do you believe you deserve happiness, and are capable of creating it?

Mel’s Question:

Mel would like to know how to lessen her attachment to her income and transition out of her current position to follow her passion.

Mel’s Key Insights and Ahas:

  • She allows fear to make her feel not good enough.
  • She doesn’t completely believe she can feel happy and fulfilled.
  • She believes being happy is being careless, irresponsible and selfish.
  • She would like a closer relationship with her parents.

How to Get Over It and On With It:

  • She should get clear on what will make her feel prepared to make a change.
  • She needs to stop using numbing devices and work through her sadness and anger directed at her mother and father.
  • She needs to write or record her vision to reprogram herself.


  • Prepare yourself to make a change by getting clear about what you want.
  • Stop using numbing devices to suppress your emotions and desires.
  • Write down or record your vision.


Christine Hassler
Christine Hassler Podcasts
Find me on Snapchat @chrishassler
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Assist@ChristineHassler.com — Send your questions to Christine, to be answered on Coaches Corner.


We all are born with the same potential. http://apple.co/1hO8XZR #overitandonwithit Click To Tweet
It’s not about how we make the fear go away, but how we work with our fear. http://apple.co/1hO8XZR… Click To Tweet
Often, the pressure of what we don’t want, creates the openness of what we do want. http://apple.co/1hO8XZR… Click To Tweet


Why you are not getting what you want

Take a moment to digest this:

Not getting what you want is actually what you truly want.

Read that statement again and let it sink in.

Allow me to explain….

We often consciously really really want something and do whatever we can to make it happen however keep finding ourselves without it.  Why? Well because some part of us really does NOT want it because on some level we are scared of having it.

I explain more about how fear blocks our deepest desires and teach you how to shift it in today’s vlog.

Continue reading

EP: 49 Give Yourself Permission to Go After Your Dreams with Emily

EP49v1It really is so important to give ourselves permission to go after what we want to do. For example, I recently gave myself permission to go on a trip to Colombia with the caveat that I would work while I was there. When I ran into wifi issues and couldn’t communicate with my team I had a bit of an Expectation Hangover. So, I decided that instead of being frustrated about it, I would move into acceptance and give myself permission to take some time off. When I fight for my will over thy will I almost always end up getting frustrated.

Emily is normally a driven and passionate person. However, she called in because she is feeling a bit lackluster lately.  She’s done a lot of personal development work, but can’t seem to find her mojo to implement the new things she would like in her life. She’s been waiting for something to give her permission to act. It’s important for her to start coming up with all the reasons why she can do something, instead of making up excuses about why she can’t.

Everything begins with just one step. In my book, Expectation Hangover, I call this Proactive Surrender. It’s about taking one step with intention and involvement and then allowing for feedback. To co-create is about being in flow with the universe and letting go of attachments of control and planning. Be open to how and where the universe wants to lead you.

Also, there are a lot of people who get stuck in the personal awareness trap. People who read a lot of books, listen to podcasts, and become very aware but things don’t ever seem to shift for them. If you find yourself in the awareness trap you must start taking action.

Coach’s Tip – When working with your clients be mindful of having them speak in “I” language rather than in the second person because when we speak in the second person we disassociate and we don’t own what we are saying. It’s important to bring clients back to using “I” language without making them feel wrong.

I invite you to join me for my retreat in magical Bali which includes meditation, yoga, one-on-one coaching and the opportunity to meet soul friends. There are only 2 reservations left. E-mail Jill@ChristineHassler.com for information on how to join any of my events or business programs.

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Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Are you feeling a bit lackluster? Would you like to feel more driven or inspired?
  • Do you need to give yourself permission to do something or are you waiting for a permission slip?
  • Have you made your human desires bad? Are you trying to get rid of your ego?
  • Do you have a heartfelt desire but can’t seem to take the first step?

Emily’s Question:

Emily who is normally driven and passionate finds herself feeling a bit lackluster and lost. She is feeling symptoms of the Imposter syndrome and may be in a personal awareness trap. She would like to know how to get inspired.

Emily’s Key Insights and Aha’s:

  • Her ego isn’t all bad
  • She needs to listen to her voice of inspiration
  • She doesn’t need to be an expert to get started
  • She has an ability to build rapport with people

How to get over it and on with it:

  • She should take the first step and listen to her seed of inspiration
  • Realize there is no point to anything
  • She needs to step into her gifts and take action
  • She needs to own her feelings and use “I” language
  • Find her internal qualities that mirror traits she admires in other people

Assignments and Takeaways:

  • Take action and allow opportunities to integrate into all of your self-health programs.
  • Give yourself a permission slip to go after what you want. Remember, it begins with by taking one step.
  • Don’t wait for opportunities to come to you. Reach out to the people you want to connect with.
  • If you relate to the “Imposter Syndrome” write out all the amazing things about you and your gifts and talents.


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Christine Hassler
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Coaches Corner with Julie Elizabeth Day


When I fight for my will over thy will. I normally always lose. Trust the universe. http://apple.co/1hO8XZR… Click To Tweet
When we have a big vision we may feel intimidated by its grandness, don’t be overwhelmed by it, go slowly towards… Click To Tweet
We are here as human beings on earth so we might as well live it up and take full advantage of the human experience.… Click To Tweet


EP 29: Why Going for Your Dreams Matters Most…No Matter What

ep 29 v1Our dreams come from our inner wisdom and our wants come from our ego.

We all have things that happen in our lives, which create fear, uncertainty, doubt and self-limiting beliefs. Often, we try to ease the pain of those things by chasing after something. For example, if you are really hard on yourself, then you may spend a lot of time wanting someone else to love you. You have a high want for a romantic relationship or you have a parent who was really hard on you or only validated you for your accomplishments, and you may have grown up with the feeling of unworthiness and high want for money and success.

Ego-based wants come from feeling ‘less than’, and then searching for something or someone to fill the void. These kinds of wants are not coming from an authentic place, because at the authentic self-level we know that absolutely nothing is missing. The want is coming from our ego. When we obtain our ego-based wants, they only give us a temporary sense of satisfaction. They do not cure the deep longing we feel for worthiness, belonging and love.

How do we know something we are longing for is not an ego-based desire but a true dream we must pursue? It comes down to the feeling of longing, which we feel in our heart, not in our head. Our dreams are a psychic prediction of what is coming; we feel a deep longing to experience something because we know that on some level, it is our destiny.  We can’t always control the form and timing of it and that is where suffering can come in.  It is imperative we pursue our dreams on the level of essence, not form; and we focus on the feelings we long to feel rather than try to make it happen or get attached to how we think it should happen.

An example of this is, perhaps you feel a longing to make an impact on the world. You feel a deep desire in your heart, which is almost painful when you feel you are not doing it right now. Instead of trying to figure out what business to start to make a difference, focus instead on the feelings you want to feel and then begin to take aligned actions in that direction. Set the intention every day to be of service and ask to be used as an instrument of impact. Look for the simple ways to make an impact right now. When it comes to dreams, waiting is not a good idea. Take action now to move you in the direction of how you want to feel and what you want to experience. The biggest roadblock to going after dreams is fear. Nothing silences the voice of your inner wisdom more than doubt and fear. Honor your dreams and stop being so scared.

Today’s caller, Anya is scared and feels guilty about wanting to go after her dream because it was not her original plan.

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I invite all of you to join me in September 16-22 for my retreat in Bali will include meditation, yoga, one-on-one coaching and the finest conversations with like-minded women. I will also be available for personal sessions. E-mail Jill@ChristineHassler.com for information on how to join the festivities or to join me in July for my signature retreat.

Consider/Ask Yourself:

  • Do you know what your dreams are? Are you terrified to go after them?
  • Do you feel stuck because you do not know how to turn your dreams and longings into actual steps?
  • Are you concerned that if you don’t go after your dreams soon you will spend the rest of your life regretting it?

Anya’s Question:

Anya has been feeling lost because she is passionate about acting but she is afraid to follow her dream.

Anya’s Key Insights and Aha’s:

  • She feels the pressure of the expectations others have of her
  • She is embarrassed that her dream is different than her education
  • She needs to take the first step

How to get over it and on with it:

  • She can give herself permission to stand for her dreams
  • She should communicate her dream to others
  • She needs to take the first step
  • She should write a list of all the reasons acting is important to her

Tools and Takeaways:

  • Give yourself permission to pursue your dreams
  • Write down a list of reasons why your dreams have value and are safe to explore
  • Change or update your story to include what matters most to you
  • Get fully behind your dreams with intention


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Christine Hassler
Expectation Hangover
20 Something Manifesto
@christinhassler on Twitter
@christinehassler on Instagram


We are conditioned to believe we are only one thing in our career but it’s not true.
When it comes to dreams waiting is not a good idea.
Dreams are indicators of what is to come. The longer you delay taking action the longer they will take to come true.”